Today I just feel the need to rant, specifically about the commonly used excuses every online seller receives from buyers who don't want to live up to their end of the deal. For example; the buyer purchases your item then decides they don’t want to pay, or, while it is in transit they decide they no longer want it but they realize it is too late to cancel the transaction. So, here’s our list of Most Annoying Buyer Excuses, in no specific order. Enjoy ~

Famous Excuse #1:  IN THE HOSPITAL! - For some reason this has always been the #1 go-to excuse for everything. The actual buyer is never in the hospital, it’s always their husband, mother, father-in-law, son, niece, aunt or sister...which makes the excuse even more annoying because, are you seriously telling me you couldn't pay for the blouse because you were at your nephews side, in ER, for the past 72 consecutive hours without ever checking your phone?   

eBay seller electric_mermaid confirms hearing this excuse, quote, “I sent customer 2 invoices stating if they needed more time than 3-4 days to pay to please communicate that or item would be relisted, unpaid strike filed etc and got no reply. Finally I Filed the unpaid item dispute and of course she replies and tells me she wishes I had contacted her before I filed and that her husband had a heart attack and paypal wasn't accessible. I reminded her about the invoices sent with no response and told her if she had an internet connection (which she obviously had since she replied) Paypal was accessible anywhere by mobile phone, coffee house computer, hospital, library." - Boom! Nailed it

Famous Excuse #2: MY KID DID IT! - This is by far the most mind-blowing excuse that is pretty common. The premise is that the buyer didn’t actually make the purchase. Instead it was their toddler, who was playing Angry Birds on their cell phone and accidentally bought your listing. Although this excuse may kind of *sound* believable, it truly makes no sense. For example, to make a purchase on our wholesale site the little kid would have to:

1. get to our site
2. find the inventory they want
3. Add it to Cart
4. Proceed to Checkout
5. Login or select “Guest Checkout”
6. enter billing details
7. shipping details
8. select a shipping method
9. type credit card info (or use Pay Pal, Amazon Pay, etc) 
10. check the “Agree to Terms” box then click Confirm Purchase

…. I think we can all agree that this is likely too complex for a 4 year old and, truth be told, while the Kindergartener might indeed use your tablet to buy extra lives in Candy Crush, they’re not going to invest 25 minutes into buying wholesale womens scarves on BigBrandWholesale.com

But the crazy “my kid bought it!” is also super common on marketplaces. eBay seller nlrebel was messaged, "please cancel this, as my two year old daughter was messing with my laptop when I got up to use the bathroom, and must have accidentally bought this" as well as "I accidentally bumped the buy it now button" - Lady, bumping the BIN button doesn't actually "buy it".

Famous Excuse #3: I ACCIDENTALLY BOUGHT IT! - There’s literally no possible way to accidentally buy something on our site (as well as most sites, including eBay) because the checkout process is an actual PROCESS. With that being said, I have indeed accidentally bought ADDITIONAL items on Amazon because they were in my Cart from a prior day and I didn’t take the time to look before clicking “Confirm”... however, I was still buying items… it’s not like I was reading a free eBook and somehow managed to make an online purchase without realizing it. - Bro, this excuse makes as little sense as your kid buying it. Ambridgebuckskins had a buyer who told her “l didn't bid, my handbag must of turned my smart phone on and it did it.” as well as “l was looking at your listing and walked away from the computer. My budgie walked over the keys, he must of bought it by doing that.”

Famous Excuse #4: I DIDN’T HAVE TIME TO READ THE LISTING - If you have sold online for a while I can almost guarantee you have heard this excuse, likely more than once. I have always thought this was such a weird excuse because the buyer is essentially implying that YOU were rushing them to hurry and buy it, therefore leaving them with no chance to read the details. In my opinion, if you need all the deets and you don’t have time to read them, common sense would be to revisit the listing again when you have time to read it…. But hey, that’s just my opinion.

Famous Excuse #5: BILLS, BILLS, BILLS! - This is the famous “I can’t pay because I have expenses!” - Um, ok, did you not have expenses before you chose to purchase it last night? A great example of this is marketplace seller bribri12 who said “She claims she can't pay for her items because of car troubles.”

Famous Excuse #6: I'M OUT OF TOWN - Why is this one of the top excuses everyone uses? And more importantly, why are you buying merchandise online if you’re not able to receive the package? We have even had people tell us they forgot they will be leaving for a vacation in the Bahamas for 3 weeks tomorrow, so they won’t be home to get the package…. Could you imagine forgetting you are jet setting for almost a month tomorrow?  AskTheeBayQueen.com shared this hilarious eBay message she received (this one seriously made me laugh because we have heard the same thing!):

eBay seller nomoaa has an even funnier version of this excuse: “Asked me why I hadn't mailed an item. I told them, you have to pay first. Their response, "I couldn't, I Was In Jail".

Famous Excuse #7: ABSOLUTELY INSANE STORIES - We once had a dude place an order and less than 1 minute later he had already sent us an email stating he has to cancel it because after he ordered he lost his home and has to move tonight, literally, right this moment. - This is a ton of activity to occur in under 60 seconds and still have time leftover to email us asking to cancel.  Dude, all you had to do was ask to cancel; we didn't need you to gin up a saga!  

Famous Excuse #8: I WAS HACKED!!! This may sound laughable but its actually a really common excuse, just ask ambridgebuckskins who had a buyer demand cancellation, stating “l had a keystroke logger on my laptop and it purchased your 4 shop items!” Or marketplace seller bribri12 has was told:  "I think someone hacked my account! Oh my god! I can't believe this is happening to me!"

Famous Excuse #9: ITS FOR CHARITY, I SWEAR! I cannot even begin to tell you guys how many people contact us to ask for specific “charity” donations, such as a $600 lot of Free People apparel (retail: $7,500). These people wanting the donations are not registered charities, they are instead (supposed) “do gooders” who have spent time browsing our website to find merchandise they need for their “cause”. Prior to 2010 I was a sucker for wanting to help these non-organization good wills. However I have since learned that 99% of these people are just looking for free inventory and attaching a heart wrenching story to it.   Regardless, this excuse is on the list because even if you offer free shipping, or to throw in some extra free merch or even sell it to them for less than your cost, the other excuses start pouring in because they want it 100% free.  No, not the Walmart tees you got for 50-cents each; they need the Free People.... for free... for the homeless! 

Love this post?  Next Read:  Online Sellers: 12 Hilariously AWFUL Crazy eBay Buyer Stories